22nd April

1 month past Cheerobics 2009. Though it is only 1 month, it feels like a long time had past, with so many new developments in the cheer scene. Though I am not directly involved in all the happenings, somehow I became link together with them; lets just say when it comes to the good stuff, they do not involve me, but when it comes to the bad stuff, they all involve me.

Is it really that hard to just wanting to train? I think this is one of the reasons why I start to lose faith in myself. Really, I find it quite flattering that 1 person can make so much difference. Is it really not possible for me to continue training without having an effect? Well I guess the effect is always there; but when it is beneficial to you, no one gives a hoot about it, and when it becomes detrimental to you, everyone starts to hang you for it.

Anyway not that it is going to matter anymore, probably going to stop everything already. Well actually nothing really matters to me, except just a little sad that the 1 thing that matters to me is that I have to hear all this from another person, or maybe a representative; else I would have been kept in the dark. If you got anything with me, just tell me up front, and not behind my back.

It took me a while thinking whether to post this after I finish typing (Because you know that with text, people can misinterpret you, because there is no tone, no facial, no emotions in the text; different people will read it differently). Just some of my feelings, but if you want to take this in a negative way and start to shoot me again, I have nothing more to say.


P.S: If someone steal your GF/BF, will you be mad? You will be mad if you love her/him. Will you be mad with the stealer or with your GF/BF? And the main question is am I still that BF of yours?